Dad Jokes - all welcome!

An attractive young woman had just finished having golf lessons from the club pro and went out to play her first round of golf. As she started her round she was immediately stung by a bee. The woman tries to carry on but the pain gets so bad she decides to return to the clubhouse.

The pro, on seeing her return so early went out to meet her and asked “Why are you back so early, what’s wrong?”

“I was stung by a bee,” she replies.

“Where?” asks the pro.

“Between the first and second hole.”

The pro nods knowingly and says “Your stance is too wide.”
A young couple started dating, and it was going really well. Then they realised that while he was a Labour voter, she was Conservative. Deciding they could manage this difference, they set a date to be married. Unfortunately, that date was subsequently chosen as the date for an election.

Undeterred, they went ahead, making all guests promise not to breathe a word about politics or the election to mar their big day. All went to plan, and before they knew it they were in a cab to their hotel for the wedding night. The cabbie, unaware of the problem, turned the radio to the news, which was full of the election results, and by the time they got to the honeymoon suite, they were having a ding-dong argument. Furious at each other, they lay in bed back-to-back.

After a while, the bride decided she was not going to let this spoil their wedding night, so she turned to her husband and said “This is silly to be fighting over the election. Why, I believe that if a Labour member were to stand now, he would get in unopposed.”

“I’m sorry, love” he replied, “I already stood as an Independent, and lost my deposit.”