The McCann's went on a family holiday and whilst I except we can all make mistakes and lower our guard sometimes, we also have to learn from them in matters of such importance.
The McCann's were notified by the hotel that Madeline had been crying whilst were out the night before the incident happened. Now if that was me and I would like to think that all loving parents would think the same, I would be embarrassed and mortified by my error and hurt at the thought that i had left your children unattended and that they had become distressed and that I wasn't there to comfort them and I would want to do everything possible not let it happen again.
So as a response what did the McCann's choose to do, yes they want out yet again for their own entertainment and enjoyment, leaving not one, not two, but three children under the aged of three once again on their own.
If you so desperately have to go out on a family holiday to a night of eating and drinking with a group of friends, take your children with you, let them sleep in a pram next to you or better still put your children who can't fend for themselves first, one of you stay in and the other go out and change over each night. They positively chose to put themselves first yet again in in light of knowing what they knew, it was deliberate, neglectful and unforgivable in my view.
I don't let my feelings of what might have happened to Madeline who was relying on her parents to care and protect get in the way of what they did and the right and proper questions about their fitness to be the parents.
Well, I personally agree with much of that, but not all.
They have imho a life sentence of pain anguish and torment, they will never be free of it. They will always have people pointing the finger too. They are not one offs in society that behave as they did. They have to somehow make their other children come to terms with their actions. Forgiveness is hard for some people, thats fine, we are all different and are capable of different levels of all sorts of things.
If you want to talk about fitness to be a parent, if you ever worked with child protection cases like I have, you might realise there are an awful lot of people who might fail your standard of fit and proper, much more so than the McCanns ever would.
What about parents who regularly take illegal drugs?
What about parents who drink way to much and pass out through alcohol from time after time?
What about parents who threaten and occasionally assault their kids?
What about the many parent(s) who despite the McCanns case do this from time to time?
What about the cases we all occasionally read where the mother has gone on a weeks holiday with a boyfriend leaving kids to fend for themselves?
What about single parents who have relationships with seriously violent partners and despite this knowledge continue the relationships?
There are some kids who have become almost feral due to terrible parenting. Gangs of kids wandering around sink estates in towns and cities up and down the country. I have come across more dysfunctional families in work related environments that most would think Impossible or made up if they only knew the half of it.
I could go on. NOBODY condones what the McCann family did, least of all me. I would bet they are incredibly remorseful of their own actions. However, most cases of stupidity (which is not a crime in itself) don’t end up with the outcome poor Maddie endured, so you don’t get to see or hear about them as they are less likely to be in the public domain as much. As I said the law of unintended consequences applies. People still do this on holiday because they are overly relaxed and unaware of all that is happening around them. Resorts at home and abroad attract criminals from all over tourists are the softest targets of all and the easiest to prey on.
In the other examples I mentioned, the kids involved suffer significantly, some scarred for life, many have reduced life chances and may grow up to repeat the parents behaviour as they may see it as normalised. What you don’t see or hear, is that ok? It might be happening next door, on your street or neighbourhood somewhere. Social Services can not take all kids into care who live in chaotic households with disturbing behaviour from parents. In some houses Social Services may never know the suffering behind four walls.
There are far worse parents than The McCanns, behaving in a far worse manner, In most neighbourhoods around where we all live. However, thankfully very few suffer the fate the McCanns unintendedly caused. The McCanns, Maddie in particular, have paid a huge price for parental mistakes. A murderer gets around 15 years maybe, The McCanns have a life sentence of torture pain and anguish that I would not wish on anyone. They have my criticism, but what is done can not be undone. Based on all that is in the public domain at present, they have my empathy and given their personal situation I wish the whole family well moving forward.
