Great news....always take the positive. Liver can re-heal its self....I've had fatty liver before....just got to take care of yourself. He's right about the anti depressants too...its not one size fits all. You need to realise that if something doesn't work for you it's not because "you're beyond repair" it's just that that course of action isn't the right one for you (I tried counselling...absolute waste of time for me). Also I think the younger ones in the medical profession are a lot more clued up on these things as mental health has, only recently, become something people talk about and acknowledge instead of just "getting on with it" or sweeping it under the carpet like it used to be not so long ago.More blood tests and getting some scans. 1st time I have seen a doctor in over 4 years. He was young (isn't everyone now)but brilliant. He didn't patronise me. Said anti depressants don't work for everyone. Very nice guy. I still don't know the answer but it isn't down the neck of a bottle. Liver is not as bad as I thought, god knows how but it is inflamed.. Thanks for being my outlet. I used to like the fact I was anonymous but I don't care now as I've met enough of you now. I was scared to talk about my troubles, not anymore as bottling up everything got me into this mental state.
Depression
- Thread starter sadgit
- Start date
sadgit
Well-known member
I had a massive panic attack when I was in there, when he asked about work and why I broke down in the 1st place. This thing in our head can be brilliant and destructive. Work broke me, work still haven't been in contact for more than 2 years. I'll get there, just a long journey. Gutted I wasn't up for a coffee on Saturday.That sounds like a really positive meeting this morning, Mark.
sadgit
Well-known member
My therapy made everything worse as she opened up old wounds I had buried. Be strong anyone who struggles, there are amazing people out there. I called the Samaritans again at 3am, just brilliant. Plus the majority of people on here, I've not been judged or criticised, that means so much.
Linthorpe_Exile
Well-known member
I nearly suffered one of my episodes yesterday - where I can't speak, feel overwhelmed with rage, teetering on spiralling inwards and downwards. But I'm a bit older and wiser (I hope) to my own emotions/thought processes when it happens, so I was able to stop it in its tracks thankfully. I made myself think rationally about the trigger, which I noticed yet again was a trivial "something and nothing" whilst having a jolly nice time thank you (and indeed I was). It almost feels masochistic.
Boro in Devon
Well-known member
I have found that when issues come to the surface, it is my brain telling me, that it is something that needs to be fixed. I had a lot of childhood trauma when I was abused, but I didnt realise that it was abuse until I had kids and was in my 30/40s. Burying issues as I had, isnt solving them rather ignoring them. I also drank to mask my thoughts, but again this was a distraction technique and I always felt worse afterwards. Opening up to a counsellor/therapist enabled me to challenge my own thoughts, which were often negative. I agree it can be difficult to talk, but for me opening up allowed me to face the issues that I had. I now know that I cant change my life, but I am comfortable where I am going in the future.
When I feel that I am on the downward spiral into negative thoughts, that may be just feeling my mood lowering or a more panicked situation, I have leant how to manage my thoughts. That is to slow the descent into depression. Then to stop the downward spiral, I do this by taking a step backwards and to challenge my thinking, which is often very emotional, take the emotions out and just deal with the facts and put them in context. The job them is to start to rebuild my mood, this I do by being kind to myself, enjoy a nice walk, go somewhere nice for a coffee or just connect with nature etc. As you become better at being in touch with your emotions you can build a maintenance strategy. Every day I check in with myself and challenge any negative thoughts, I ensure that I do something for myself that I enjoy. I also consider those around me and make sure that they are ok (kids and friends)
There are a lot of things in my life that arent ideal. My business collapsed in the pandemic, I am divorced and can no longer work due to physical ailments. I dont focus on these things as they are things that I cant necessarily change. Instead I focus on the positive things, my kids, my friends, my hobbies and trying to enjoy what I have in my life.
Hope that this may help in some small way
When I feel that I am on the downward spiral into negative thoughts, that may be just feeling my mood lowering or a more panicked situation, I have leant how to manage my thoughts. That is to slow the descent into depression. Then to stop the downward spiral, I do this by taking a step backwards and to challenge my thinking, which is often very emotional, take the emotions out and just deal with the facts and put them in context. The job them is to start to rebuild my mood, this I do by being kind to myself, enjoy a nice walk, go somewhere nice for a coffee or just connect with nature etc. As you become better at being in touch with your emotions you can build a maintenance strategy. Every day I check in with myself and challenge any negative thoughts, I ensure that I do something for myself that I enjoy. I also consider those around me and make sure that they are ok (kids and friends)
There are a lot of things in my life that arent ideal. My business collapsed in the pandemic, I am divorced and can no longer work due to physical ailments. I dont focus on these things as they are things that I cant necessarily change. Instead I focus on the positive things, my kids, my friends, my hobbies and trying to enjoy what I have in my life.
Hope that this may help in some small way
I keep making the same points on this subject but it comes from personal experience.
Due to the systemic lack of funding in the NHS, GPs are just not equipped and/or knowledgeable enough to be the ones dishing out the meds for mental illness. Unfortunately, for most people, GPs can be the first a and last port of call for mental health issues when, clearly, these cases should be referred to an expert. I have suffered from mainly anxiety attacks but also depression all of my life. My first panic attack was when I was 10.
Nicotine, unbeknownst to me, kept me steady from my teens right up until I stopped. After I stopped smoking, it all came back with a vengeance (within 3 weeks) and I was having multiple panic attacks a day.
Like a lot of people, alcohol became a crutch that I used because the GPs just did not understand what was happening and I was put on beta blockers etc. Nothing the GPs did or referred me to helped one, tiny bit. Actually, it made me worse as I desperately thought that there wasn't any treatment available.
I tried hypnosis, CBT, Chinese medicine, every supplement known to man, Yoga, acupuncture. Slowly but surely, my alcohol consumption increased. GPs used the alcohol to refuse treatment. They blamed my problems on my drinking and not realising that I was drinking BECAUSE of my symptoms.
I am not loaded, by any stretch of the imagination, but I finally saw a shrink privately for a few hundred quid - this got me 2 or 3 consultations. I was in my 30s, by this point. She got me sorted and pretty quickly.
After coming off antidepressants a couple of years ago, under the supervision of a shrink, I went into the worst depression of my life. As it happens, the old meds didnt work when we tried them again and it took 5 or 6 attempts to get the meds that got me back on an even keel. This kind of treatment would not have been available to me on the NHS.
But i got sorted. Once again, a private shrink got me sorted, often trying meds that the GPs didnt actually know about. I still have meds that I know are there, in case I have acute anxiety, but I never use them. But they are there : in my wallet, my laptop bag, my car glove box, my office drawer. I never use them but they are a comfort. Again, these meds are not prescribed by a GP, to begin with, but I get them, whenever I need them, because the GPs have a letter from the shrink.
And then there are all the things I have listed in my signature.
Due to the systemic lack of funding in the NHS, GPs are just not equipped and/or knowledgeable enough to be the ones dishing out the meds for mental illness. Unfortunately, for most people, GPs can be the first a and last port of call for mental health issues when, clearly, these cases should be referred to an expert. I have suffered from mainly anxiety attacks but also depression all of my life. My first panic attack was when I was 10.
Nicotine, unbeknownst to me, kept me steady from my teens right up until I stopped. After I stopped smoking, it all came back with a vengeance (within 3 weeks) and I was having multiple panic attacks a day.
Like a lot of people, alcohol became a crutch that I used because the GPs just did not understand what was happening and I was put on beta blockers etc. Nothing the GPs did or referred me to helped one, tiny bit. Actually, it made me worse as I desperately thought that there wasn't any treatment available.
I tried hypnosis, CBT, Chinese medicine, every supplement known to man, Yoga, acupuncture. Slowly but surely, my alcohol consumption increased. GPs used the alcohol to refuse treatment. They blamed my problems on my drinking and not realising that I was drinking BECAUSE of my symptoms.
I am not loaded, by any stretch of the imagination, but I finally saw a shrink privately for a few hundred quid - this got me 2 or 3 consultations. I was in my 30s, by this point. She got me sorted and pretty quickly.
After coming off antidepressants a couple of years ago, under the supervision of a shrink, I went into the worst depression of my life. As it happens, the old meds didnt work when we tried them again and it took 5 or 6 attempts to get the meds that got me back on an even keel. This kind of treatment would not have been available to me on the NHS.
But i got sorted. Once again, a private shrink got me sorted, often trying meds that the GPs didnt actually know about. I still have meds that I know are there, in case I have acute anxiety, but I never use them. But they are there : in my wallet, my laptop bag, my car glove box, my office drawer. I never use them but they are a comfort. Again, these meds are not prescribed by a GP, to begin with, but I get them, whenever I need them, because the GPs have a letter from the shrink.
And then there are all the things I have listed in my signature.
Keep at it.
Think of the people you helped in Ukraine. An incredible thing to do when you, yourself, were suffering. Give yourself a pat on the back.
sadgit
Well-known member
I will never forget taking a woman (and her dog) back to see her army husband or the one I drove from Mariupol to live with her family in Oxford. They were long days but I did it. I deserve a pat on the back for enduring the PL/UA border crossings
particularly one I did in 37 minutes, longest was over 7 hours.Tough old day today again. Fine but the same old loneliness. Decided to keep the white beard for at least a month. Bloody itchy.
whinneybanksaint
Well-known member
A goatee, sunglasses and a trilbee hat and youll be the picture of suave sophistication. !
sadgit
Well-known member
Or an old man looking like a knob
I can't say I've ever really been susceptible to depression, but I must confess to quite liking the soundtrack...
www.bbc.co.uk
Archive on 4 - Dom Joly - Goth or Not? - BBC Sounds
Dom Joly used to be a goth - or did he? He journeys through the archive to find out.
www.bbc.co.uk
Aet290204
Well-known member
Couple of questions for you Sadgit, if you don’t mind me asking:-
1) have you got the Samaritans on speed-dial?
2) do you get loyalty points for calling them twice in one day?
Am asking for a friend you understand.
We shall have to start feeding their volunteers the football results. They’ll be there going “ooh heck it’s that depressed Middlesbrough fan again did they win/lose/draw at the weekend?”
Only messing - take care dude.
sadgit
Well-known member
Yes on speed dial, they say I can talk to them as often as I want. They really help me. When you hardly sleep or say a word to anyone in days they are long old days. I will make sure I will give money back to them.Couple of questions for you Sadgit, if you don’t mind me asking:-
1) have you got the Samaritans on speed-dial?
2) do you get loyalty points for calling them twice in one day?
Am asking for a friend you understand.
We shall have to start feeding their volunteers the football results. They’ll be there going “ooh heck it’s that depressed Middlesbrough fan again did they win/lose/draw at the weekend?”
Only messing - take care dude.
I do know you are messing but thankfully it is never recorded and your number isn't either. So they say
Aet290204
Well-known member
Need to do what you have to do mate.Yes on speed dial, they say I can talk to them as often as I want. They really help me. When you hardly sleep or say a word to anyone in days they are long old days. I will make sure I will give money back to them.
I do know you are messing but thankfully it is never recorded and your number isn't either. So they say
I’ve used them. More than once. Not gonna say saved my life cos it would be untrue but they serve an important purpose.
sadgit
Well-known member
1st time I called them, they did save my life. Tomorrow is another day. I go home Thursday, just to cut the hedges but something to look forward to. See my cats and ferrets, be "home" just avoid nosey neighbours. Then more blood tests.
Aet290204
Well-known member
One day at a time mate.
If it’s that bad then one hour at a time.
All you can do.
Oh and if you are ever in the Cambridgeshire fens and fancy a hedge to cut……