Anyone else simply had enough?

Aet290204 said:
Because I have.
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Sorry to hear that Aet, hope you feel better in the morning

There are some real, honest caring people on here who genually look out for others, so nice to see 👍

I know I've mentioned it before, when i feel down & emotinal & i really do at times, i listen to my music, remanice & look at my younger days, following the Boro, games, players, read my scrapbooks, anything to uplift me, probably the real reason i post so much rubbish on here
Aet, im not saying you should listen to my type of music, or any type of music, IIRC, we're probably total opposites on musical taste, but as others have said, feel free to PM also

Take care Aet & good night fella
 
bumface said:
Some people mistake the bumfaced board persona for the real me mate. We're not the same person. I've tried to reach out to him. He isn't interested. That's his choice. I mean I've only attempted suicide three times so what do I know about mental health problems?
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Sorry to hear that bumface,
 
Hope you're feeling a bit better 👍

Just a word of warning regarding some of the previous advice. I'd personally be wary about looking too much into the past, reminiscing or using nostalgia in an attempt to boost your mood. These things will often fuel any low mood present and can trap you in cycle of always looking back. What we know about the mind and experiences is that they change over time and thoughts can become unreliable and encroach on fantasy. That tasty pie you had 30 years ago may not have been that nice and that great match you saw probably wasn't as good as your mind is now telling you. Memories become magnified and greater meaning is attached to them, which heightens the emotional experience. Each memory is glossed over with euphoria and idealisation. But they aren't strictly reliable, more probably unreliable, so you end up longing for something that isn't available and possibly didn't even exist in the form that it is now thought of.

Obviously some memories can provide warmth and satisfaction. But a preoccupation with them can stifle progress in terms of feeling better. It can actually mimic a state of mourning where one is unable to let go and process what is now not there. This grip can be draining and a mindset develops that everything good was in the past and it can't exist in the present or future.
 
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So I just woke up and I don’t remember writing much of this.
Im sorry for posting it again.
Im miserable unhappy extremely lonely and physically unwell.
My family can’t cope with my depression anymore.
The doctors are disinterested in my problems and uncaring. I’m supposed to be on a waiting list but I’m just being ignored.
My Work has all but forgotten about me. No one stays in contact. When they do the conversation is stilted. I dread returning as I hate working from home. Utterly grim. There was nothing wrong with how it was in February 2020 but they are hell bent on change.
I started to run to beat the depression but I’ve been ill and I can’t now. I can’t even walk long distances like I could I’ve not got the strength.
It’s just existing. No enjoyment from life at all.
I’ve lost interest in anything and everything

Sorry for going on.
 
Aet290204 said:
So I just woke up and I don’t remember writing much of this.
Im sorry for posting it again.
Im miserable unhappy extremely lonely and physically unwell.
My family can’t cope with my depression anymore.
The doctors are disinterested in my problems and uncaring. I’m supposed to be on a waiting list but I’m just being ignored.
My Work has all but forgotten about me. No one stays in contact. When they do the conversation is stilted. I dread returning as I hate working from home. Utterly grim. There was nothing wrong with how it was in February 2020 but they are hell bent on change.
I started to run to beat the depression but I’ve been ill and I can’t now. I can’t even walk long distances like I could I’ve not got the strength.
It’s just existing. No enjoyment from life at all.
I’ve lost interest in anything and everything

Sorry for going on.
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Don't apologise, as others have said the fmttm community is always here. Something that worked for me in the past when low was to remember however bad it seems 'you've got through this before and you'll get through again eventually'
 
Someone’s gonna need to stop me from taking my stockpile of pills. I need to end this suffering.
 
Please don't do this, AET

I wish you all the best of luck in fighting this terrible affliction. I've read your posts and how you've been feeling lately and I hate to say I am going through just the same thing and it felt like I was reading about myself looking at your posts. I've struggled with it for over 15 years and have never been in as much trouble as I am currently because of it. You mentioned family etc, I am going through that too.

I hit the roof yesterday in a misunderstanding between family and friends aimed at me and just made a total mess a hundred times worse. :ROFLMAO:

I hope you feel better soon pal, please leave another post so we all know you're OK??

Godspeed, bro.
 
Still ill and suffering physical pain, not that anyone at my repugnant GP surgery cares. **** the clapping for the NHS - bunch of RSoles. only a matter of time before I succumb to these thoughts.
I’m clearly becoming a stuck record so won’t trouble anyone again.
 
Aet290204 said:
Still ill and suffering physical pain, not that anyone at my repugnant GP surgery cares. **** the clapping for the NHS - bunch of RSoles. only a matter of time before I succumb to these thoughts.
I’m clearly becoming a stuck record so won’t trouble anyone again.
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You're not a stuck record, mate, you're someone who deserves help that he's not getting. I'm heading south from Tyneside this Thursday and would be more than happy to meet you for a coffee on the way?
 
Aet290204 said:
Still ill and suffering physical pain, not that anyone at my repugnant GP surgery cares. **** the clapping for the NHS - bunch of RSoles. only a matter of time before I succumb to these thoughts.
I’m clearly becoming a stuck record so won’t trouble anyone again.
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Please continue to reach out, particularly if it helps in anyway....I think it's sometimes good just to write down how you feel? Sounds like you are struggling to get the professional help you need through the NHS, which I know can be a bit of a postcode lottery. In my area there's a really good online referral service, maybe something similar near you or alternatively try some of the voluntary groups. In my experience talking to people, particularly those experienced helps a lot more than you think it will. All the best mate #utb
 
Aet have you tried changing your GP practise. It's important that you get professional/medical help for your illness(es) they require medical treatment possibly for the longer term, there is only so much you can do on your own. Once you find the medication that is right for you (may take awhile though) other things will start to fall into place . Try and stay strong .
 
Keep fighting it AET. The fact that you keep posting on this board suggests to me that you are open to help and support but I appreciate how frustrating it is for you that the professional help just isn't there for you.

I hope you can see that this whole board has your back and will do whatever we all can to see you through this and onward to better times ahead.
 
You may have already tried this but you can do a self referral to IAPT Services - this cuts out the GPs who you are having issues with. I had a similar experience last year in that to this day they never got back to me. Several weeks ago i did a self referral, was contact back the following day for a full assessment and current support is on going.

Regardless of if this is helpful or not, please keep going - you will get past this
 
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