What song would you like to be played at your funeral?

This...I'd love to watch the attendees squirming as it plays

Ah, I can see them now
Clutching a handkerchief
And blowing me a kiss
Discreetly asking how
How come he died so young
Or was he very old
Is the body still warm
Is it already cold

All doors are open wide
They poke around inside
My desk, my drawers, my trunk
There's nothing left to hide
Some love letters are there
And an old photograph
They've l aid my poor soul bare
And all they do is laugh
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha - ha, ha, ha!

Ah, I can see them all
So formal and so stiff
Like a sergeant-at-arms
At the policeman's ball
And everybody's pushing
To be the first in line
Their hearts upon their sleeves
Like a ten-cent valentine
The old women are there
Too old to give a damn
They even brought the kids
Who don't know who I am
They're thinking about the price
Of my funeral bouquet
What they're thinking isn't nice
'Cause now they'll have to pay
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha - ha, ha, ha

Ah, I see all of you
All of my phony friends
Who can't wait till it ends
Who can't wait till it's through
Oh, I see all of you
You've been laughing all these years
And now all that you have le ft
Are a few crocodile tears
Ah, you don't even know
That you're entering your hell
As you leave my cemetery
And you think you're doing well
With that one who's at your side
You're as proud as you can be
Ah, she's going to make you cry
But not the way you cried for me
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha - ha, ha, ha

Ah, I can see me now
So cold and so alone
As the flowers slowly die
In my field of little bones
Ah, I can see me now
I can see me at the end
Of this voyage that I' m on
Without a love, without a friend
Now all this that I see
Is not what I deserve
They really have a nerve
To say these things to me
No, girls, just bread and water
All your money you must save
Or there'll be nothing left for us
When you're dead and in your grave
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha - ha, ha, ha
 
Spirit in the sky
But whoever is there has to sing
Gonna go up to ‘the Boro’ in the sky
That’s where I wanna go when I die
When I die and they lay me to rest
Gonna go to the place that’s the best
 
Freed from desire... absolutely blasted .. with flashing lights.. just after the last address to congregation. And they all encouraged to join in with the ....na na na na na nah na , na na na na na nah
 
I have always loved The Marmalade's original version of this song. Melancholic pop songs don't get any better. I've had it as an earworm this week so I started looking at various versions and came upon this, with original writer and singer Dean Ford performing it in the last few years of his life (He died rather prematurely in 2018). It takes on added poignancy as sung by him in his later years. It made me think of this thread. I might add it to John Martyn's "Just Now" as one for my funeral. Note, I hope to be distracted by many other songs before I shuffle off this mortal coil.

 
no song, just a tv showing the old test screen off air picture of the clown and the young lass that the bbc used to have on before it went to 24hr waffle
 
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