I went to the fertility clinic and the girl behind the counter asked me that as part of the treatment would I be ok masturbating in a cup.
I said I would but I would prefer to start in a little league before taking on the pressure of a knockout tournament.
I saw a mate of mine the other day, walking down the road, holding hands with a monkey.
"Why are you holding hands with a monkey"?
"I'm taking it to the zoo" he said.
The next day, I saw him again.
"I thought you were taking the monkey to the zoo"
"That was yesterday" he said. "Today, I'm taking her to the pictures".