Job problems - anxiety - any advice please

I'm sure you're aware Marty but you're looking to exit now with the best outcome for yourself. By all means log everything but be clear that this is to get a good exit - you can't go back to that.

You're cards have been marked unfortunately and I wouldn't waste too much of your stress on a company like that mate.

I would follow the advice above but personally would have a conversation with HR that says, look its clear that you want me out. Let's settle this amicably and agree to part ways with you getting say two months pay.

They won't want the hassle of you digging in. Presumably you don't want the stress of a protracted battle with them.

Best of luck mate
 
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Sorry to hear about your situation, it happens to many of us, myself included.

If you have a history of anxiety/ stress/ depression you have to find a way to work with these conditions.
I think you said that you are in charge of a department, and therefore people. You also say that you are working long hours doing everything. You need to realise that your resources are finite and therefore plan to what you can reasonable do, and also delegate to your team. as a senior manager I would want to see that the projects/tasks are being managed and prioritised accordingly.

Informing your employers of your mental health issues is the right thing to do, however in my opinion, you can not expect them to manage your health. They need to respond, if you tell them that you are struggling, but the ownership of the situation is yours. If things are becoming difficult then you need to raise the issue, I appreciate that this is easier said than done when you are struggling.

When I have been in this situation I find it very easy to personalise all of the issues around me. This shows the kind of person that you are, however you may need to push this away from yourself and stop the feelings of persecution. The personalising of the issues is often the feeling of spiralling into further mental health issues. The best thing is to stop the decent as soon as you can.

Advice has been given above about exercise, meeting friends and family and finding the key to enjoying life. It is important that you document the activities that you are doing to proactively manage your situation. Staying in bed, alcohol/ drugs or other destructive behaviours are not your friends in this situation. If you do make a claim for constructive dismissal, this type of document will count in your favour.

Working in marketing you should know how to publicise your situation. If the company does terminate your contract, make sure that you do not sign a gagging clause. Use the opportunity to tell the world, suppliers and customers the bad way that you have been treated, you do not have to name the company, but you can make some damage to their brand image.

I hope that these points may help you in some way, if not now but maybe in the future.
 
I'm being cynical here but ideally you need to engineer a situation here where they pay you to leave (more than the statutory notice period) and provide you with a good reference for your next employer. At the same time you need to use this sick leave period (and any extension to it) to absolutely look after yourself!

My advice would be to engage with the HR Dept. only, not your line manager or area manager or anyone like that. Even register a grievance, as long as it doesn't increase your anxiety.

I don't think you're going back there so you need to get as much out of them as possible.

All the best mate and keep your chin up!
 
Sorry to hear this Marty.

Not a lot I can add as there is already a load of good advice posted previously.

Been in this situation myself a few years back. Three month review was excellent, no problems. However job I was working on started to go to sh*t (not my fault at all) but my manager (who was at fault for a lot of issues but was too busy climbing the greasy corporate pole) needed someone to pin it on to save his own ar*e......me.

Things came to a head when he asked me to grab a coffee and have a chat through the job......instead he started to pull me, my work, management capabilities apart. C*nt - time to get out.

So, couple of interviews later was offered another job fairly quickly - wasn't ideal, but needed to jump before being pushed.

Wrote a nice email to HR informing them of my mental health problems and how this had triggered things and ...nothing (HR were useless). Doctor's note for a week which didn't go down well. Fate sealed.

I knew I had something sorted, but was waiting, waiting for the formal offer to come through....tooke a while.

So, was called to my 6 month appraisal with my boss......and HR. So, walked in knowing full well this was either going to be the start of disciplinary procedures, or formal notice. So when they started I just said "can I stop you there, I've got another job, I'm leaving, I'll formally hand my notice in now. Thanks" and walked out of the meeting. Look of complete disbelief on both of their faces was lovely.

If I see my old boss again it's going to be very difficult not to f*cking smack him one, the slimy c*nt.

So anyhow, stay strong, you will get out of this s***y situation - but use every trick you can - mental health, doctors notes, raise formal grievance etc to buy some time. Do everything you can to sort yourself out.

Good luck👍
 
If you have decided that this is the end with this company, then now is the time to start making some rses tighten, whilst your on the sick.

Make all your contacts with the HR department, not with your manager. Then when they start asking him for information and documents he will be able to start worrying about why they want them.

Ask for a copy of the companies grievance procedure, disability policy and performance management policy and procedure.

Also ask for copy of your personal file and any documentation or correspondence relevant or relating to you.
You do not need to say why you want the documentation, other than you have a legal right to it.
Once you get this you can see who has been making the complaints etc. it should also contain records of your probation review, proving ypu were performing appropriately. It will also have a copy of your application and details of your health problems, if you haven't kept a copy.

If none of this is there, then get back to HR and ask where it is.

As somebody else said make sure every contact that you have is in writing, and keep a diary of everything that you do.

Good luck
 
I'm sure it has already been mentioned, but as you have less than 2 years service I think the only protection you have is on grounds of discrimination.
https://www.gov.uk/discrimination-your-rights
Previous action plans and reviews are pretty much irrelevant I'm afraid.

As well as the Citizen's Advice Bureau, ACAS are also very good and might be able to offer advice: https://www.acas.org.uk/dismissals

This is also an informative link: https://www.monacosolicitors.co.uk/unfair-dismissal/two-year-employment-threshold-matters

Good luck.
 
I am probably repeating what has already been said/advised.

1/ A Performance Improvement Plan should never be a surprise. Normally, an initial concern would be raised - one to give you chance to respond or to acknowledge and agree it doesn't happen again etc etc. If issues continue to arise then and only then should a manager put forward a PIP. This should then be shared for you to review and question or ask for clarification on any points outlined or even dispute them. A PIP should also have a discussion on what will pass the PIP or what would be classed as a fail and then the potential next steps if that happened. It seems none of that has happened so you need to raise this with HR and as mentioned put pressure back on your manager by asking for the examples being used.

2/ They cannot dismiss/ignore what you shared in your health questionnaire/disclosure in your employment and they should have already being taken steps to ensure you are supported with regular check ins. Again this is something you need to flag to HR.

This sounds like a terrible place to work. To go from passing your probation and a pay rise to this with in a couple of weeks is really bizarre. You have said you do not want to go back and i don't think you ever could.

Get your 2 weeks initial sick note extended to at least a 4 weeks in total - Contact HR and cause them as much disruption as possible. Get everything in writing and provide this to HR.

In the meantime, use the 4 weeks to get out and get fresh air. Get logged on and get applying for jobs permanent and even contracting positions so you continue a regular income.

As devastating and tough as these situations are, often you find a much better role, with better people where you can succeed.

Keep us posted and take good care of yourself.
 
Unfortunately with you only being there six months you dont have many options. That being said you can get a good outcome for yourself.

I would do what Borofur has said above... But i would go one further. Do not engage with the manager at all, Email the HR team and raise a grievence. Advise them of everything that has happened and ask for further clarification as to the sudden turn around in just two weeks.

Explain that the work plan for the next four weeks is unachievable and designed for you to fail giving them the reasons why

tell them you have no support, mentor or confidence in your line manager.

Tell them that you feel bullied and it is affecting your mental health.

then wait and see what they say...

once they come back to you, you can start talking money and references to leave on your terms
 
Unfortunately with you only being there six months you dont have many options. That being said you can get a good outcome for yourself.

I would do what Borofur has said above... But i would go one further. Do not engage with the manager at all, Email the HR team and raise a grievence. Advise them of everything that has happened and ask for further clarification as to the sudden turn around in just two weeks.

Explain that the work plan for the next four weeks is unachievable and designed for you to fail giving them the reasons why

tell them you have no support, mentor or confidence in your line manager.

Tell them that you feel bullied and it is affecting your mental health.

then wait and see what they say...

once they come back to you, you can start talking money and references to leave on your terms
Your best bet at that point might be to negotiate an ex gratias payment
 
Hi everyone. Just wanting to post as I’m having a few problems at the minute. I started a new head of marketing job back in September last year. I passed probation in December and things were great. I came back in January and only 2 weeks ago was given a 5% pay rise. My manager the MD telling me he’s really pleased and well done. I then get called into a meeting on Monday morning after 2 days holiday to take my girlfriend away to York. He tells me I’m not performing, he’s been told by other managers I’m not doing my job and decides to put me on a 4 week performance plan. Basically trying to move mr out of the business. The things he raised have never been raised in my last review when I passed probation, no evidence and nothing recorded. He set me 6 tasks to complete by end of Feb, 2 of which I have no control over and it’s clear he wants me out. How can I go from a pay rise to that within 2 weeks. I have a long history of anxiety and depression and have been in some dark places over the past few years. I declared this when I started the job on my medical forms. No one in HR or senior management ever acknowledged my records. Never approached me to see if I might need help or additional support. Iv got progressively worse with my anxiety with the job and the way they have put so much pressure on me. Long days and nights working which has affected my relationships with family and friends. Haven’t been sleeping for weeks and just gone into my shell. I phoned my doctor first thing on Tuesday and broke down, he’s signed me off for 2 weeks and iv sent my signed doctors note to HR. I have had messages From my boss since asking if I want to rearrange meetings etc. just no support or care for my welfare.

I don’t want to go back. I have had to deal with a lot of politics in the job and it’s making ill. I’m off now until 13 Feb but I’m just not sure which way I go about this. They haven’t acknowledged my medical history which I thought long and hard about declaring before I started. Any help or advice would really mean a lot to me. Sorry for such a long post. Thank you
Go back, kick the door open, say “I’m the fcukin big man round here now, I want 50% of the company and a £100k pay rise! And if anyone has a problem with it then let’s step outside and sort it now!”

On a serious note, I couldn’t provide any advice better than which you have been provided with so good luck with it all Marty 👍
 
Had a very similar experience with a company I worked at for 10 years. I’d been running the store for 6 months after the store manager had quit and the assistant manager went on the sick. I was only a deputy at this point. I hit every target, the store actually improved its KPI’s and the staff were all advocating me to be given the store. I didn’t ask for it, I asked for assistant manager position as I didn’t want all that pressure on myself, plus I enjoyed the work/life balance.

The company said I wasn’t ready (despite the evidence to the contrary) and hired the daughter of a fellow store manager (who’d never worked in the business) and wanted me to train her to be my superior. At this point, I put in for a weeks holiday to think it over, when I got back I’d been sent for a disciplinary as it was an ‘unauthorised’ holiday. I appealed it, and it was instantly dismissed. The area manager who approved my holiday told me he’d sort it. I then got word that he said he’d never approved it and I was absent. I immediately went on the sick and I stayed there for 3 months until I found the job I have now.

My advice would be to stay on the sick as long as you possibly can, get yourself well, refuse to speak to anyone over the phone or face to face, document everything and use the time to find something else.
 
fantastic Advice shared already. Suffered similar treatment myself and never once regretted leaving. CBA fighting constructive dismissal.

I’m replying because I was able to self extend my fit notes, I just used to ring the health centre and they’d get the fit note ready for me to pick up. It was 2019 and 2020 I done this though.
 
Very similar thing happened to my mate recently. He stayed calm about it but made a strong case about how he knew he was being managed out of the business, got them to admit they’d decided to close the post, and managed to negotiate a decent pay off. He is an HR bloke so knew all the right things to say, so if you know anyone who works in HR (external to this org) speak to them. The most important thing to remember, as hard as it is, is that it is almost certainly nothing personal, even if they are behaving like tvvats.
 
Some great advice and just to echo some of the above:
1.Get in a union ASAP
2. Remember a Performance Plan is designed to be a support measure built for success and not for failure, so every step of the way they need to demonstrate the lengths they have gone to to offer the level of support to ensure success
3. If you are currently off sick and don’t want to engage with the manager, then ask HR for a intermediary, someone to be the go between, this can be a union rep
4. If you are in a position to move on from this job, use that as a motivating factor and if you can, some sort of de-stress, as the worse case scenario can be manageable.
5. If you do believe that the only outcome will be dismissal and you can accept that, then keep getting your sick note extended, assuming you are on sick pay, as the performance plan will be put on hold, while you are off, so you will be taking more money out of their coffers, the longer you are on sick leave.
5. Consider raising a grievance with HR against the manager, if you believe the performance process was not followed to the letter.

Good luck, use you time off to get some exercise and fresh air and try to forget all their nonsense, easier said than done, I know.
 
First priority has to be your health and mental well-being. For you to pass your evaluation and get a pay rise suggests that you are not only competent but we’re exceeding expectations. ‘Long days and nights’ suggest that you were being overworked.. bosses love that! Doesn’t seem like a coincidence that this performance plan came in after your two days holiday.

Happy when your killing your self got them and then it’s the end of the world when you take a holiday.. yeah nice one!

These six tasks that you have no control over sound a bit like a test albeit an unnecessary one.

Look after yourself no matter what at all costs.. your bosses would do the same for themselves and at your expense.

The obvious would be to look for another job.. but maybe there is a way it can work out ok with the current place? Difficult for an MD/manager to understand what your needs and requirements are.. if there is some way you can get that across.. that might be helpful.

Some great advice and just to echo some of the above:
1.Get in a union ASAP
2. Remember a Performance Plan is designed to be a support measure built for success and not for failure, so every step of the way they need to demonstrate the lengths they have gone to to offer the level of support to ensure success
3. If you are currently off sick and don’t want to engage with the manager, then ask HR for a intermediary, someone to be the go between, this can be a union rep
4. If you are in a position to move on from this job, use that as a motivating factor and if you can, some sort of de-stress, as the worse case scenario can be manageable.
5. If you do believe that the only outcome will be dismissal and you can accept that, then keep getting your sick note extended, assuming you are on sick pay, as the performance plan will be put on hold, while you are off, so you will be taking more money out of their coffers, the longer you are on sick leave.
5. Consider raising a grievance with HR against the manager, if you believe the performance process was not followed to the letter.

Good luck, use you time off to get some exercise and fresh air and try to forget all their nonsense, easier said than done, I know.
hi everyone.

Just wanted to say thank you again to all of you for your help and support. Very overwhelming the support you guys have shown me and I’ll be forever grateful. Iv had a very positive chat today with HR and I’m taking the time to get myself better.

I can’t thank you enough. I Would love to see some of you in the pub to buy you a beer. Shake your hand. And thank you. You guys might not realise how much you have all helped me lift my head and feel like I’m not alone with this. I’m proud to be from Middlesbrough. We have some of the best most genuine people in the world. And this post just proves it.
 
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I'm sure you're aware Marty but you're looking to exit now with the best outcome for yourself. By all means log everything but be clear that this is to get a good exit - you can't go back to that.

You're cards have been marked unfortunately and I wouldn't waste too much of your stress on a company like that mate.

I would follow the advice above but personally would have a conversation with HR that says, look its clear that you want me out. Let's settle this amicably and agree to part ways with you getting say two months pay.

They won't want the hassle of you digging in. Presumably you don't want the stress of a protracted battle with them.

Best of luck mate
Thank you for your help. Everyone has given me such good advice that’s really helped me.
 
Some great advice and just to echo some of the above:
1.Get in a union ASAP
2. Remember a Performance Plan is designed to be a support measure built for success and not for failure, so every step of the way they need to demonstrate the lengths they have gone to to offer the level of support to ensure success
3. If you are currently off sick and don’t want to engage with the manager, then ask HR for a intermediary, someone to be the go between, this can be a union rep
4. If you are in a position to move on from this job, use that as a motivating factor and if you can, some sort of de-stress, as the worse case scenario can be manageable.
5. If you do believe that the only outcome will be dismissal and you can accept that, then keep getting your sick note extended, assuming you are on sick pay, as the performance plan will be put on hold, while you are off, so you will be taking more money out of their coffers, the longer you are on sick leave.
5. Consider raising a grievance with HR against the manager, if you believe the performance process was not followed to the letter.

Good luck, use you time off to get some exercise and fresh air and try to forget all their nonsense, easier said than done, I know.
Thank you for your advice Holgate
 
Very similar thing happened to my mate recently. He stayed calm about it but made a strong case about how he knew he was being managed out of the business, got them to admit they’d decided to close the post, and managed to negotiate a decent pay off. He is an HR bloke so knew all the right things to say, so if you know anyone who works in HR (external to this org) speak to them. The most important thing to remember, as hard as it is, is that it is almost certainly nothing personal, even if they are behaving like tvvats.
Thanks for reaching out buddy. Sorry you had to go through something similar. Thanks for helping me not feel isolated with it.
 
fantastic Advice shared already. Suffered similar treatment myself and never once regretted leaving. CBA fighting constructive dismissal.

I’m replying because I was able to self extend my fit notes, I just used to ring the health centre and they’d get the fit note ready for me to pick up. It was 2019 and 2020 I done this though.
Thanks Smoggs. Hope you’re doing well buddy.
 
Had a very similar experience with a company I worked at for 10 years. I’d been running the store for 6 months after the store manager had quit and the assistant manager went on the sick. I was only a deputy at this point. I hit every target, the store actually improved its KPI’s and the staff were all advocating me to be given the store. I didn’t ask for it, I asked for assistant manager position as I didn’t want all that pressure on myself, plus I enjoyed the work/life balance.

The company said I wasn’t ready (despite the evidence to the contrary) and hired the daughter of a fellow store manager (who’d never worked in the business) and wanted me to train her to be my superior. At this point, I put in for a weeks holiday to think it over, when I got back I’d been sent for a disciplinary as it was an ‘unauthorised’ holiday. I appealed it, and it was instantly dismissed. The area manager who approved my holiday told me he’d sort it. I then got word that he said he’d never approved it and I was absent. I immediately went on the sick and I stayed there for 3 months until I found the job I have now.

My advice would be to stay on the sick as long as you possibly can, get yourself well, refuse to speak to anyone over the phone or face to face, document everything and use the time to find something else.
Thanks bud
 
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