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I just bought a new kettle and am concerned about the brew time. It took 1 minute and 54 seconds to boil 2 mugs of water. My old kettle took 1 minute and 20 seconds. I am thinking of taking it back. It will take me approximately 25 minutes to take it back to Argos, so it would be around 100 mugs...

The milk has gone off so I had a drink of custard instead of my usual mug of tea. I think I'm onto something. Don't know why it's never caught on.

They should try using the 80s method now, of scaring the living **** out of people. This fallout video would make a good starting point. Create a haunting John carpenter style early 80s synth jingle. Sadly Patrick Allen died several years ago. Besides which most people would probably associate...

Goodfellas Henry Hill played by Ray liotta Tommy disimone known as Tommy Devito in the film played by Joe Pesci James Burke known as Jimmy Conway in the film played by De Nero

There used to be a snake at the Parkway shopping centre which was used to trap children in whilst their parents went shopping. I spent many hours of my childhood stuck inside the snake on all fours in pitch darkness while the security guards tried to get fifteen children to back up as a fat kid...

Usually mine have a pleasantly robust beefy flavour with lots of character and notes of chestnut and mahogany. Just had an omelette though and let rip with an eggy one. Had to open the windows and the cat left the room after giving me a funny look.

Ours has increased. Most if not all others have declined. Surprised at how well forest are supported. This year on top.

Not band names you have made up out of thin air, but ones you have seen somewhere and thought, that would be a good name for a band. For example from the BBC news website today: Lazer Vagina Menopause Therapy.

Llamas to save humanity. https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/science-environment-58628689.amp Thank you Llamas

The adverts on here are trying to sell me it at 40% off, which to me sounds like a good deal. Don't know what it's for though. I'm a bit worried it might be a lady version of one of the tripods, you know the one, 80s sci fi show. Don't want it trying any mind control crap on me.

I worked in a sausage factory. This is not a euphemism. Just looked them up on the internet and they're still going 20 years later.

I've spotted a problem with the green away shirt. It's blue.

I reckon 18 months. A bunch of scousers made a "we know where you live, don't sign" banner but left it outside the wrong house. :D That's the sort of thing that should win awards.

If there's going to be a decent sized crowd does that mean the England band will get in? If this is the case I am officially transfering my allegiance to Germany in the hope we don't have to put up with the Great escape theme and on the ball being performed ad infinitum throughout the rest of...

What should I have for tea.

:LOL:

Wolves.

Wasn't this just kneeling down in the olden days? When you sit down are you "taking the ****"?

Apparently there is a shortage https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-57299350.amp&ved=2ahUKEwiKoIq42vLwAhUi0uAKHdnmBhgQyM8BMAB6BAgMEAM&usg=AOvVaw1ULJM8HQx2-YAGCKIfvldi&ampcf=1

I need TP for my bunghole.