Job problems - anxiety - any advice please

M

Marty79

Well-known member
Hi everyone. Just wanting to post as I’m having a few problems at the minute. I started a new head of marketing job back in September last year. I passed probation in December and things were great. I came back in January and only 2 weeks ago was given a 5% pay rise. My manager the MD telling me he’s really pleased and well done. I then get called into a meeting on Monday morning after 2 days holiday to take my girlfriend away to York. He tells me I’m not performing, he’s been told by other managers I’m not doing my job and decides to put me on a 4 week performance plan. Basically trying to move mr out of the business. The things he raised have never been raised in my last review when I passed probation, no evidence and nothing recorded. He set me 6 tasks to complete by end of Feb, 2 of which I have no control over and it’s clear he wants me out. How can I go from a pay rise to that within 2 weeks. I have a long history of anxiety and depression and have been in some dark places over the past few years. I declared this when I started the job on my medical forms. No one in HR or senior management ever acknowledged my records. Never approached me to see if I might need help or additional support. Iv got progressively worse with my anxiety with the job and the way they have put so much pressure on me. Long days and nights working which has affected my relationships with family and friends. Haven’t been sleeping for weeks and just gone into my shell. I phoned my doctor first thing on Tuesday and broke down, he’s signed me off for 2 weeks and iv sent my signed doctors note to HR. I have had messages From my boss since asking if I want to rearrange meetings etc. just no support or care for my welfare.

I don’t want to go back. I have had to deal with a lot of politics in the job and it’s making ill. I’m off now until 13 Feb but I’m just not sure which way I go about this. They haven’t acknowledged my medical history which I thought long and hard about declaring before I started. Any help or advice would really mean a lot to me. Sorry for such a long post. Thank you
 
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You are being managed out of the business, for some reason. Its really ****.

Document the hell out of everything, make sure all communication is done via email or letter, no phone calls.

Use the two weeks to look for another role, then once out, fight for an unfair dismissal claim and use all the evidence you have collected.

Your health suffering isn't worth going back to the job, but you can sure as hell give them indigestion afterwards.
 
Thanks so much Baron. Really appreciate you taking time to offer advice. Yes I realised they are trying to move me out. I’ll ensure I document every single thing. Would I have to wait until I did the 4 week performance plan and potentially get let go before I took it down the legal route? Would I have any grounds to do it now based on the fact I’m off with depression which they have exasperated and haven’t shown me a duty of care? Thanks again 🙏
 
The first thing is you and your safety. When things like this happen (especially with anxiety) we get locked in a bubble that we sometimes can't see a way out of. I know it's not as easy saying 'it's only a job', especially in the times we are in, but it is only a job. You and your mental health are what's important. Ultimately they are fu cking you over so don't feal any guilt in being off sick, it's their fault. The projects they can pick up. Keep busy, maintain a structure involving anything but work other than remaining in contact with HR letting them know your circumstances and let them deal with it.

If not in one, join a union.
 
I wouldn't bother with the unfair dismissal or constructive dismissal, you've only been there since September. I would put it down to experience and move on, work on your health and look for another role as stated above they are at fault.
 
Johngannonsunderpants said:
The first thing is you and your safety. When things like this happen (especially with anxiety) we get locked in a bubble that we sometimes can't see a way out of. I know it's not as easy saying 'it's only a job', especially in the times we are in, but it is only a job. You and your mental health are what's important. Ultimately they are fu cking you over so don't feal any guilt in being off sick, it's their fault. The projects they can pick up. Keep busy, maintain a structure involving anything but work other than remaining in contact with HR letting them know your circumstances and let them deal with it.

If not in one, join a union.
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Thank you. I wasn’t sure whether to post it on here and I’m so glad I did. It really helps to know I’m not alone, which gives me a lift, I struggle with the isolation and constant negative thoughts. You are right I need to stop feeling guilty and look after myself. I’m not in a Union and hasn’t thought about it as my head has been all over, I’m looking into a potential union now. Thank you for taking the time to help me
 
I went through something similar a few years back Marty.

My advice would be to get that 2 weeks sick note extended to 4 weeks ASAP. This will give you a bit more breathing room, time wise, to assess exactly what you're going to do. Your doctor should sign this off no problem if you are firm with them that nothing has changed.

I'd definitely echo what Baron said regarding documenting everything, and making sure this is all documented in writing, should the need come for anything to be looked at further. I'd request evidence/examples of what these other 'managers' have said, and ask for exactly what the next steps are to be once this 4 week performance plan is finished (I'd also ask exactly what this performance plan is?) I'd purely request these to push back on them, but I wouldn't hold my breath for anything.

I think you only being there for such a short space of time means the bottom line for me though is that there's no coming back from this (definitely from my experience of hearing people on performance plans, it's basically a push to get somebody out) so you need to try and clear your head from their noise, and focus on yourself and what's to come. You've said that you you don't want to go back anyway, and I'd imagine unless you are very comfortable financially, a job is needed in the short/mid term, so over the next 4 weeks I'd make sure you're structuring your days to get yourself back on track.

Set aside time for yourself each day, exercise/gym if possible, seeing family/friends if possible, whilst also making time each day to focus on your next career steps. Plenty of Marketing jobs out there at the minute, get your CV dusted off, get yourself on job sites/LinkedIn etc and get some career positivity and pride back by securing a few interviews. You can then hand your notice in on your terms, rather than being dismissed.

Good luck mate!
 
boynogg said:
I wouldn't bother with the unfair dismissal or constructive dismissal, you've only been there since September. I would put it down to experience and move on, work on your health and look for another role as stated above they are at fault.
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Thanks. It would get messy wouldn’t it with courts. I’m entitled to 4 weeks notice as iv passed probation. Thanks for your help
 
Has this company got a decent HR department? You need to register your concerns. Not easy, this is an emotionally charged situation (and quite rightly, you are being stitched up), but you need to ensure you are impassionate and focus on facts not feeling in your communications. I would say you feel you are being "managed out" and focus on:

1) No disciplinary history before the performance plan......no verbal or written warnings, not even anything informal (in fact, passing probation and being given a pay rise [was this performance related in any way?] are complete counter-indicators.

2) Being given a performance plan without any say in the content (these things are supposed to be supportive) and (most importantly) containing elements that are out of your control.

3) No concessions or even acknowledgement of your mental health.

As above, I'd document everything and I would also have a chat with an employment lawyer as this seems to be heading to constructive dismissal.

From your own health and wellbeing situation, you need to remember that this is a case of a **** company and not a **** employee here. They're stitching you up. Good luck.
 
Your employer is legally obliged to offer you help and support for mental health issues, they should have some form of counselling etc set up , could be worth enquiring via HR .
 
Even if you don't want to go to court, a lawyer will advise you in ways/words that will ensure that you can leave in a good position rather than being sacked. The company won't want a court case, so may be more minded to support you moving on if they think you're not going to just let them walk all over you. They sound a horrible firm tbh.
 
joeychicago said:
I went through something similar a few years back Marty.

My advice would be to get that 2 weeks sick note extended to 4 weeks ASAP. This will give you a bit more breathing room, time wise, to assess exactly what you're going to do. Your doctor should sign this off no problem if you are firm with them that nothing has changed.

I'd definitely echo what Baron said regarding documenting everything, and making sure this is all documented in writing, should the need come for anything to be looked at further. I'd request evidence/examples of what these other 'managers' have said, and ask for exactly what the next steps are to be once this 4 week performance plan is finished (I'd also ask exactly what this performance plan is?) I'd purely request these to push back on them, but I wouldn't hold my breath for anything.

I think you only being there for such a short space of time means the bottom line for me though is that there's no coming back from this (definitely from my experience of hearing people on performance plans, it's basically a push to get somebody out) so you need to try and clear your head from their noise, and focus on yourself and what's to come. You've said that you you don't want to go back anyway, and I'd imagine unless you are very comfortable financially, a job is needed in the short/mid term, so over the next 4 weeks I'd make sure you're structuring your days to get yourself back on track.

Set aside time for yourself each day, exercise/gym if possible, seeing family/friends if possible, whilst also making time each day to focus on your next career steps. Plenty of Marketing jobs out there at the minute, get your CV dusted off, get yourself on job sites/LinkedIn etc and get some career positivity and pride back by securing a few interviews. You can then hand your notice in on your terms, rather than being dismissed.

Good luck mate!
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That’s such a huge help, and all makes a lot of sense to me. I’m trying to put a plan in place now to move forward and as you and the others kind people have said. Concentrate on getting better and setting a routine. I’m going to get out on my bike, to for walks and apply for other jobs. I feel better for posting this, I can’t honestly thank you all enough for caring and giving me good advice. Im now thinking get to end of month with another 2 weeks off. Then hand my notice in with 4 weeks obligation. That would give me another 2 months pay and time to get a new job. Thank you 🙏
 
I would like to second what others have said and concentrate on yourself rather than the job.

I would follow goalscrounger's suggestion of logging it with HR, and if you do need support, there are plenty on here willing to give it or listen to you.

It sounds like getting it off your chest already helped you.
 
goalscrounger said:
Even if you don't want to go to court, a lawyer will advise you in ways/words that will ensure that you can leave in a good position rather than being sacked. The company won't want a court case, so may be more minded to support you moving on if they think you're not going to just let them walk all over you. They sound a horrible firm tbh.
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Makes great sense. I do feel like they have massively let me down. What’s the point in me declaring a mental illness on entry to the job for them to just ignore it, not even acknowledge it. I could say well why didn’t I raise it again. But as many people will know it was hard enough declaring it, to then have to raise it again I wasn’t comfortable with. And the performance plan is out of the blue, no record of anything. Thank you for helping me
 
Marty79 said:
Hi everyone. Just wanting to post as I’m having a few problems at the minute. I started a new head of marketing job back in September last year. I passed probation in December and things were great. I came back in January and only 2 weeks ago was given a 5% pay rise. My manager the MD telling me he’s really pleased and well done. I then get called into a meeting on Monday morning after 2 days holiday to take my girlfriend away to York. He tells me I’m not performing, he’s been told by other managers I’m not doing my job and decides to put me on a 4 week performance plan. Basically trying to move mr out of the business. The things he raised have never been raised in my last review when I passed probation, no evidence and nothing recorded. He set me 6 tasks to complete by end of Feb, 2 of which I have no control over and it’s clear he wants me out. How can I go from a pay rise to that within 2 weeks. I have a long history of anxiety and depression and have been in some dark places over the past few years. I declared this when I started the job on my medical forms. No one in HR or senior management ever acknowledged my records. Never approached me to see if I might need help or additional support. Iv got progressively worse with my anxiety with the job and the way they have put so much pressure on me. Long days and nights working which has affected my relationships with family and friends. Haven’t been sleeping for weeks and just gone into my shell. I phoned my doctor first thing on Tuesday and broke down, he’s signed me off for 2 weeks and iv sent my signed doctors note to HR. I have had messages From my boss since asking if I want to rearrange meetings etc. just no support or care for my welfare.

I don’t want to go back. I have had to deal with a lot of politics in the job and it’s making ill. I’m off now until 13 Feb but I’m just not sure which way I go about this. They haven’t acknowledged my medical history which I thought long and hard about declaring before I started. Any help or advice would really mean a lot to me. Sorry for such a long post. Thank you
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One take away from this is that they are trying to
Manage you out of the business, from what you have said I don’t think this is related to your performance as they have done a complete 360 in the space of a fortnight so take comfort from the fact you did your job and well.

They could be closing the role or trying to bring in someone on less money. It’s a very poor way to conduct business but this sort of thing happens. Use the two weeks to put yourself first and see if you can get something else lined up.

Like it has been said above document everything just in case.
 
Norman_Conquest said:
I would like to second what others have said and concentrate on yourself rather than the job.

I would follow goalscrounger's suggestion of logging it with HR, and if you do need support, there are plenty on here willing to give it or listen to you.

It sounds like getting it off your chest already helped you.
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Thanks Norman. 100% it has helped reaching out on here. There’s some bloody good people in this world. Thank you
 
Sexpom said:
One take away from this is that they are trying to
Manage you out of the business, from what you have said I don’t think this is related to your performance as they have done a complete 360 in the space of a fortnight so take comfort from the fact you did your job and well.

They could be closing the role or trying to bring in someone on less money. It’s a very poor way to conduct business but this sort of thing happens. Use the two weeks to put yourself first and see if you can get something else lined up.

Like it has been said above document everything just in case.
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Interesting points there sexpom. It is so odd like you say a complete 360 in 2 weeks. Just shows me there’s something going on as you’ve said. Everyone has said including my family and friends that it’s horrendous the way they’ve gone about it. Makes me never want to step foot in there again.
 
goalscrounger said:
Has this company got a decent HR department? You need to register your concerns. Not easy, this is an emotionally charged situation (and quite rightly, you are being stitched up), but you need to ensure you are impassionate and focus on facts not feeling in your communications. I would say you feel you are being "managed out" and focus on:

1) No disciplinary history before the performance plan......no verbal or written warnings, not even anything informal (in fact, passing probation and being given a pay rise [was this performance related in any way?] are complete counter-indicators.

2) Being given a performance plan without any say in the content (these things are supposed to be supportive) and (most importantly) containing elements that are out of your control.

3) No concessions or even acknowledgement of your mental health.

As above, I'd document everything and I would also have a chat with an employment lawyer as this seems to be heading to constructive dismissal.

From your own health and wellbeing situation, you need to remember that this is a case of a **** company and not a **** employee here. They're stitching you up. Good luck.
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That’s a massive help. Some fantastic advice, I’m ensure I follow the 4 steps. Thank you for taking the time to help
 
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